Confessions of a Lapsed Vegetarian

It's awful. It's disgusting. It's over 1,800 calories and more than ONE HUNDRED grams of fat. It's Grade Z beef from what was most likely a very miserable cow. I know all that.

I still kinda sorta want one:

And I think maybe you kinda sorta want one, too...

All Things Pasta & Dairy

So you may or may not know about our extremely difficult experiment with a gluten-free and dairy-free diet last spring. Some doctor had some bright idea that The Tall Guy's health problems could be alleviated by abstaining from two of our three favorite food groups (the third being chocolate). It was horrible. It was expensive. It was not any fun at all, even though I'm fearless in the kitchen.

We stuck with it for three months. After a lot of discussion and review, The Tall Guy decided he was not seeing enough benefit (actually, none at all) to justify the aggravation and cost. We celebrated the return to regular diet with pizza, mozzarella sticks and Chinese dumplings. That was a fun day. The result of the failed enterprise was a newfound appreciation for things creamy, cheesy and wheat-y. Two of our favorite meals are posted below. These are the ones we missed most during that time, as we mention whenever I serve one of them.

Macaroni & Cheese

This is The Tall Guy's favorite, and ranks pretty high with the Boychik as well. Two secrets to this sauce - Jarlsberg or other mild swiss, and double mustard.

Go to the deli of your favorite market. Ask them for their cheese ends. Whatever they've got, take it. Don't ask, just accept what you're given. HOWEVER - if there is no Jarlsberg, Alpine Lace or the like in your stash, get a quarter pound while you're there.

Cut all the cheese into 1" cubes, or as best you can. Dump them into a pan and add enough milk to not quite cover the cubes. Add a squirt of dijon mustard, but go easy. You can always add more, but you can't take out. A dash of Worcestershire sauce - please spend the extra change and go for the good stuff. Lea & Perrins is the original and I think the best. Next stir in some dry mustard. I can't tell you how much, sorry. I just sprinkle it in till it looks like enough and then taste. No salt needed, there's plenty of that in the cheese and woowoo sauce. Heat slowly, stirring frequently until it's all melted smooth. If you're feeling adventurous, add a drop or two of hot sauce. Why not?

Pour over pasta of your choice, or potatoes or veggies or anything else that looks good in cheese sauce. None of that flour-roux-thickener crap! Cheese is thick, leave it alone! I like to add ground pepper at the table.

Pasta e Fagioli

This is super easy and so good.

One large onion

Mushrooms, if desired

One green or colored pepper, if desired

Garlic, fresh minced or powder

3 large cans tomatoes - diced, sauced, squashed, whatever. Add all juices.

Stock or water/bouillion equal to amount of tomatoes

1 small can tomato paste

1/2 to 1 pound ham, small diced

1-2 cans cannellini beans, rinsed well

1 pound small pasta, traditionally ditalini

Saute veggies together in a stock pot until soft and transparent. Add tomatoes, water, paste, ham and beans to pot and simmer at least 20 minutes. Just before serving, add pasta and cook according to time on package. You may want to add more water if it looks too dry after the pasta has soaked up the water. I've been know to add a handful of spinach or shredded carrots, or various other things that need to be used. It's a very forgiving recipe. Enjoy!

Things I'd love to share with you: Parma Rosa sauce with The Tall Guy's homemade sausage recipe. And raspberry marble pudding cake with chocolate ganache. Yeah, that one's worth coming back for.

The Prodigal Blogger Returns

Is anyone out there? It's been a very long time since I've been here with any degree of regularity. Lots has happened, please allow me to fill you in!

1. The Tall Guy has been diagnosed with chronic Lyme disease.  Who knew it would be with us forever? It's the biggest reason I haven't been around. Three years, tens of thousands of dollars and about a jillion doctor visits to get it figured out, but at least now we know what we're dealing with. Diagnosis and treatment is a nightmare, and it's really just too much to go into right now. But he's feeling better and that's a RELIEF :)

2. The house hunt has begun in earnest. We looked at five properties last weekend, two of them quite promising. The weather was perfect, and even though we ended up doing some almost-off-road trekking in the clown car, we had a wonderful time. Because the market keeps getting softer and softer, we're holding out for something that really speaks to us.

3. I've been transferred to our main office in The Capitol. The job is interesting, I'm saving lots of taxpayer dollars and feel validated and/or appreciated (almost) every day. It's a big change for me. I miss my workboots. I miss working with men. I miss having my own office with a door. But it's a good move nonetheless.

4. The Girl Child is engaged to be married in December. Oy. I'm very pleased for her, but it makes me feel so ooooold. They just bought a house, hooray for them. Love her!

5. The Boychik seems to have gotten his apples together. He's got a nice girl, and a job with a startup electronics recycling company. He's finding his way, growing into the man I know he can be. Love him too!

So...what's new with you?

Snow Day

Below find pics explaining why I called in to work today. Maybe not much for our Syracuse or Colorado readers, but certainly enough to disable the Hudson Valley.

Stay safe out there!

Knead-less Pizza Dough

I've been playing around for a few weeks, trying to create the perfect homemade pizza dough. It had to be quick, easy and tasty. This weekend I finally came up with what I think is the blue-ribbon winner. It's light and airy, crispy on the outside and chewy on the inside. And anyone can manage it. Even I, who have a lifelong aversion to working with yeast. This recipe is written for folks who can't cook, so disregard the obvious steps if you're comfortable in the kitchen.

KNEAD-LESS PIZZA DOUGH

Dry Ingredients:
2 cups unbleached white flour
1/2 cup semolina flour (this makes a big difference in the rising)
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp onion powder
Scant 1/2 tsp salt

Wet Ingredients:
1 cup lukewarm water (it should be the same temperature as your finger)
1 packet (2¼ tsp) yeast
2 Tbsp olive oil
1 Tbsp honey

Also:
Cornmeal
Nonstick cooking spray
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Makes two 12" thin pizzas, or one 16" thick crust pizza.

Preheat oven to 425°. Preheat pizza stones or pans in oven.

In one bowl, sift together dry ingredients. In another bowl, mix the yeast with the water. Add honey and oil, stir to combine. Add the dry ingredients, half at a time. Stir until mixed and a ball forms. It will be slightly sticky. Grease the bowl that held the dry ingerdients, transfer the dough there to rest. Cover with a towel and rest in a warm spot for 10-20 minutes (not too warm!).

Refrigerate covered for 4-24 hours to allow the yeast and flavors to develop. Remove from fridge at least an hour before using. Between the warm and cold rests, it will have at least doubled in size.

Lay out wax paper on the counter, enough to work your dough to match the size of your pan. I use two overlapping sheets. Do not oil the wax paper or you'll have slippery problems later. Spritz your hands with cooking spray before working. Divide the dough in half if needed. Smoosh out the dough to slightly smaller than the size of your pan(s). Don't press out all the air, you want it to stay kind of fluffy.

Remove your pans from the oven, spritz with cooking spray and sprinkle generously with cornmeal. Starting at the edge of the pan farthest from your body, lay the edge of the dough on the pan and flip it in upside down into the pan. It's hot, so be careful (duh). Peel off the paper slowly. Pieces of dough may stick to the paper, but that's ok. If big pieces come off, just press them back into the holes. Make adjustments to size and shape if needed.

Prick dough with a fork and bake for 5 minutes. Remove from oven and add your toppings. Bake for about 10-13 minutes more, until center is done and toppings are bubbly. Remove from oven and let sit for 5 minutes before slicing.

The Beauty of Brine

Happy New Year! I was originally planning to talk about our holiday menus today. We had a ton of good stuff to eat, many enjoyable hours were spent in the kitchen and most items surpassed expectations. But they all paled next to The Brined Chicken. Thus the title and focus of today's post will outline the beauty of brine. Veggies be warned and come back again later.

How could something so simple, so low tech, so frugal make so much difference in a piece of meat? With nothing more than a gallon of water and a few ounces of salt, a meal can be transformed from "oh, chicken again" to "don't you dare come between me and that chicken!" There are a jillion web pages that explain the science behind the process that keep lean meats moist and tender. I recommend http://www.cooksillustrated.com/images/document/howto/ND01_ISBriningbasics.pdf, which gives a quick and dirty lesson on the how and why.

But it's enough for me to know that it does work wonders. Brine is to chicken and pork what a crock pot is to beef or lamb. We had a whole chicken ordered special from our friendly neighborhood butcher. It was a big boy because we do love us some leftover chicken salad (with a little dill and carrot, oh my!). We generally roast our chickies in the rotisserie. You know, set it and forget it - we're also suckers for As Seen on TV, remind me to tell you about our Ninja. Anyway, the rotisserie is a wonderful invention and totally worth the hundred bucks or so. It keeps the chicken moist and the skin gets all crispy, just fabulous. But I do have to admit that a brined chicken makes that taste like sawdust. We soaked our boy in a simple mixture of 1 gallon water, 1/2 cup salt, four cloves of garlic and some crushed rosemary. Set the pot in the fridge for a day. The Husband pulled him out and gave him a rinse Christmas Eve morning and patted him dry. When I got home from work, we stuck him in the rotisserie for an hour and three quarters. We usually give some additional searing time after the meat is done to make sure everything crisps nicely, but maybe it was something in the brining that made it unnecessary this time.

I don't usually eat the chicken skin. I love it, but it's completely incompatible with Weight Watchers. However, there was no turning it down. Resistance was futile. And I honestly didn't try very hard. Oh my goodness, bless my buttons, and come all ye faithful, I have never had a chicken like this. It was everything I've always wanted a chicken to be, but never knew it could. Please try it. Really, please get a chicken this week and brine it before cooking. You won't be sorry, I promise you.

We have no leftovers...

Other menu items over the last 10 days included a Chinese buffet, phyllo dumplings, stuffed mushrooms, sundried tomato dip, baked la-ziti and baklava. Fruit and veggie cleanse tomorrow! Best wishes for a happy, healthy and successful New Year!